Proud to be a girl

By Usra Shaukat

How it is easy for people to claim that “You cannot do this, because you are a girl.” If a daughter wants to be a pilot or a judge, probably she will get the same answer. She is weak; therefore, she cannot fly a plane. She cannot judge things the way men can do. The reason is they are not as strong as men. They should stay inside homes and cook foods and be loyal to their husbands. They should not move forward in their life because if they do, they will bring changes. They will no more remain inside houses, they will no more remain silent for their rights, and they will no more remain quiet when they are deprived from education. These all are the reason why we girls always get the same answer that we cannot do this or that. It’s just the mentality that our society had set up for us. I think there are only two obstacles in the way of every girl which stops her to achieve the desire goals. If these obstacles are removed, then nothing can stop her. One of them is people and the society which we live in. People usually weaken girl’s strength just by saying that they cannot do it, as a result they lose hope. If they are unable to encourage them, at least no negative comment is expected. No one has any right to take away their hope. Secondly, the girls themselves start to believe that “yes” they cannot go forward in professional fields in their lives. They lose their hope and become a dependent entity plus accept the ways they are .They never try to step out from the expected behavior from them, like handling kitchen, bringing up babies, cleaning up dishes and all kind of house chores. They set their minds like this and it becomes hard for those females to bring a positive change in their lives as well the community. This way community lags behind and the holistic development of such community ceases. As a student of undergraduate I say a big “No” to these two hampers and see things in my life differently. I prefer to live my life the way I want. I believe in myself. There have always been people supporting me in shaping my life what it is like today. Their full time support and encouragement has enabled me what I am today. I will remain thankful to them throughout my whole life. One of them is of course my family, who always trusted on me and taught me to trust myself no matter whatever the circumstances are.
Secondly, my teachers who throughout the academic year taught me that destiny is not important, what matters is the journey. They made me a person to believe in myself as a girl, who has potentials to do what can be done to the best and the fullest. I have learnt that gender has no role to play in the walk of life, what plays the best role is continuous hard work, commitment and dedication to your studies, your aims and your families and to your communities. In June 2015, I did my intermediate from Aga Khan Higher Secondary School Kuragh, Chitral. This school helped me a lot to flourish myself and today if I am student of one of best universities in Asia, the credits goes to this school. It is my great pleasure to mention the name of our Principal, Madam Sultana Burhan Uddin, who helped me a lot to get admission in Asian University for Women, Chittagong, Bangladesh. She asked me to fill the forms and sit for the test. It was my good luck that I was one of the seven students from all over Pakistan whose name was selected for this university and was given a four-year full scholarship. I am the first girl from my area to get admission in this university. People asked me how can I live in Bangladesh? How can I live without my parents? Will I be able to cope with the new environment and will be able to accept the diversity? What if I forget my own culture? All these were the challenges which I had to face. Yes I thought about them, it was difficult for me to go abroad and study along with students from 16 different countries. I had to accept the diversity. The best thing is I never lose my hope. My family asked me that if I am not comfortable to go then I have to stay back. But what I learned in my 20 years life is to accept challenges. Being a girl does not mean to accept what others say you cannot do, rather I believe it’s all about having faith in yourself and do whatever can be best done. Then no doubt success will be yours. I am currently studying at the Access Academy in Asian University for Women, Chittagong, Bangladesh. My intended subject is PPE (Philosophy, Politics and Economics). I have set lots of future goals for myself and one of them is to become a CSS officer and serve my community. Therefore, I say I am proud to be a girl.

35 Replies to “Proud to be a girl”

  1. Bo shally ma kae bo khoshan htam ta hoslo poshy mgm tan pardo tan hayo soti kag Ki kmyan korur ispa universitia chitrali kae genean poshy asusi gae kae ginian sora ispa janjal d korisusi tan chitraro izzato cha waqaro soti kag Ki kmyan korur awa ta beheel aratam

  2. Absolutely discernible thoughts,just keep it up these will surely bringdown disastrous customs from the society.Nothing can stop you to achieve your goal.Proud of my society of having people with such a strong and precious thoughts.Xur ta behl artm.

  3. That should be the spirit as well as motivation for all girls. Thumbs up! We hope, rather we believe you are gonna shine there as well.

  4. well done dear sister.MA you have already made the barriers void. U have set an example for others too. With this opportunity you will find other horizons too,The subjects u have chosen are of great interest.Go with these and go on and on for your journey.IA everything towards your target will b smooth-you have chosen the mountain to climb and you know how to climb it.And it is also of great interest that u want others to join u climbing the mountain . well done to the buttom line .shabash

  5. great usra it is a good job to express your feeling and specially the problems of females gender in our society, it need to be change you are the once who can change it.
    you are the change agents we always here and ready to help you people once again keep it up and move…

  6. Outstanding Usra. Proud of you. Could you please explain the sentence, “destiny is not important, what matters is the journey” as taught to you by your teachers through out your academic career. The Sentence read with the last sentence, “I have set lots of future goals for myself and one of them is to become a CSS officer and serve my community”, creates lot of confusion.

  7. I am proud of you girl, and proud of all those brave females from all conservative areas especially Gilgit, Baltistan and Chitral, where women used to be treated like slaves or housemaid by men. women were not allowed for getting higher education, work in public spheres, travelling alone and if she promoted to a senior position on the basis of her performance and capabilities, she was considered to be a bad character that she slept with her boss to get promotion bala bala.
    But I believe and confident that women are as intelligent, strong, and have a capacity to perform any profession more efficiently and effectively than men. I was one of the initiative takers who broke the cultural taboos and customs by driving car in the market first time in the history of Gilgit-Baltistan. Men folk from my own area considered driving car in the public place by a woman as a shameful and embarrassing act. The community put pressure on my family as well as my organization to stop me driving car in the public place. Anyhow, I have faced many challenges and have been through all those obstacles and barriers while taking first initiatives against cultural practices and customs which was preventing women in development and empowerment. Today, every girl who takes bold and brave step reminds my of the past, but at the same time, I feel very happy and proud of those females who are taking bold steps and joining every challenging field which was assigned for a men by our culture. Keep it up brave girl. I am proud to be a girl too.

    1. Excuse me women of GB and chitral are used to be treated like slaves?? Go to pukhtoon culture and see the condition of women then you will realize how much freedom has been given to our women.

  8. A well written article with a variety of powerful words, depicting commitment, dedication and keenness to exceed in this male dominated society.
    Your article would be a source of great inspiration for many, bound by the society and lack strength. Keep up the good work!

  9. I read your article, really tremendous and amazing. you have shared the challenges faced and are facing.As a being parent and father i acknowledge your requirements and appreciate your effort in the field of education and learning. This is initiative, but the truth further and further away. To gain high goal and to become a leader it requires to pay more expensive effort. Hard time and challenges make a man perfect,as your distance from dears and nears indicates the vision of Imam of the time about the quality of education as you are in learning process,go a head and carry on your efforts without caring a pin for any body.God bless you,

  10. First of all, thank you to all of you to go through my article and to share your thoughts with me. Though it was quite long, but I will try my best to write short by next time. I was so happy while reading the comments. They all are very appreciable. I hope to see more comments like these, when I will write my next article. Once again thank you so much to all of you.

  11. Well d0ne ma xan kum0ru…pr0ud 0f y0u.
    InshaAllah u will b CSS officer..gud luck nd well wishes f0r y0u.

  12. Need to remove the Social construction living within the loop provided by islam.Becouse Islam is the complete code of life for evry muslim.

  13. Usra beta! First of all I extend my heartfelt congrats for your study abroad in a prestigious University and your courage to, temporarily, leave your parents for a good cause. Your writ-up is appreciable.I have been an activists to fighting against the menace of gender discrimination and have depicted the whole scenario in a booklet,namely,” Xurnama”,published during 2010 by Anjumane Taraqui Khowar, Chitral. Unfortunately, the book could not be made available to every girl/ woman due to marketing failure of the organization.My study and observation hold our mothers,more responsible for the gender discrimination. To day the attitude is rapidly changing. If majority of our daughters and sisters realize their status in the society then, they can beat the old conservative opinion of our religious clerks.Be sure that not every man is apposed to women rights.

  14. Both the obstacles you mentioned are products of our social structure and patriarchal mindset which bars females from coming forth and indicating to their families if they have life goals. If they do, this is seen as rebellious on their part. But over the course of time,our society has been changing. Women have been silently resisting the system and now more and more women are seeking education and demanding the rights they deserve. Men are also realising that by putting women down, they themselves are the ones who suffer too. These changes have positive impacts not on just one particular gender, but society as a whole, leading to a more progressive & enlightened society. The pace of this social change is faster in our beautiful Chitral compared to other districts of KP, mainly due to education & exposure and courage of people like you and your family. May you meet with success in all your aspirations and setting examples for others. God bless you!

  15. best of luck for all of you out there and in any part of the world. come back and serve chitral. this should be the aim of every chitrali.

  16. Dear yusra we believe in daughter like you. you’re sronger than a son. my great student im proud of you. weldone keep it up.

  17. I appreciate you courage and intention to become a CSS officer and serving your country. keep your efforts on and try to achieve your goals onward. Hats off.

  18. You are a precious and golden feather in our cap to adorn us. I am proud of you, my sister. Let us smash the fetters we are meshed in.

  19. Great attempt, I must say. The prevailing misogyny is the result of several factors. Mainly it springs up due to the religious clerics, who stand to lose every time the women are in power.
    Secondly, the judgmental and hypocrite attitude of the society must come to an end. The people who are against female education are the ones who want to take their women to a female physician only.
    We’ve failed our women and that’s it. Let’s once and for all forget the ‘gender’ thing and never deprived any human being from their right to education in any corner of the planet.

    1. What a beautiful piece of writing sister :).. I really appreciate the way you put your feelings and thoughts into words. Being a family member and a girl, I am extremely proud of you today. You have a lot more to achieve and InshAllah you will one day :).. My best wishes and support is always with you. Stay blessed.

  20. You are the proud duaghter of backward area Chitral, ofcourse you are the best because you know that being a girl you can do every thing and achieve your goals in the life. we are praying for your successful life every time. You are an example for every girl to come out for achieve their life goals. best of luck and all the best

  21. Dear sister,i appreciate your good effort. No doubt nothing is impossible for a willing mind.If you are fully commited in your vision then you can conquer the whole world.Our pray and best wishes are with you for your bright future ahead.Proud of you and keep it up..

  22. Dear sis.
    Great Article like it…..In sha Allah you become CSS officer and not serves only your comminities but you will be serves whole Pakistan…

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