PSF girls wing chief slams party leaders
PESHAWAR, Nov 9: The president of People’s Student Federation (PSF) Chitral’s women wing, Bibi Jan, has criticized the desolation of the cabinet of the student wing. She said the decision to dissolve the cabinet was taken by an outsider. Speaking at a press conference in Peshawar on Friday, Bibi Jan said she had taken up the issues of the students in Chitral and threatened last month to hold a sit-in outside the President House in Islamabad. However, Falak Naz, the president of the PPP women wing Chitral, dissolved the cabinet of the female student wing. She said Ms Naz dissolved the cabinet of the PSF girls wing violating rules. She claimed that Ms Naz was not a Chitrali and had no right to represent the people of the valley. She said she was struggling to get resolved all the issues being faced by the female students in Chitral, especially transport problems. “Asma Alamgir visited Chitral thrice during the past a few years and promised to provide a bus to the girls college and a grant of Rs10 million for the welfare of Chitrali women but failed to keep her words,” she added. She appealed to the party’s co-chairperson Asif Ali Zardari and Faryal Talpur to take notice of the injustices with the party workers and students in Chitral.]]>
I have no Idea why some people go out of the topic and start attacking other’s personal life. I personally don’t know the girl who married the guy from Gilgit but who are we to discuss what she did. Why we are so prejudiced? By reading some of your comments, I wonder more Chitrali girls may not decided to marry outsiders. “Tan gerdani sanjeero no loli khoro gerdani drowo tana”
Let’s accept that the girls who are marrying with outsiders are helpless. They have no other options because the boys, majority of whom, still lack some basic things, which every girl, would like to see in her would be husband. This is human nature and no one can deny it. You have to be financially sound, well educated and good looking to marry girl in any part of the world and Chitral is no exception. If you have all these qualities, there is no dearth of girls and you can marry any girl of your choice. The area where we are living, to some extent is a bit civilized compared to other parts of the country.
You can not discredit some prominent names, who married off their daughters with boys who had no family background. They were accepted with open arms after they proved themselves through hard work and made a respectable name in the society. All the friends who had to face disappointment in cases which involves love, they must not run after it again because this world is full of beautiful people. If you failed to win the heart of a girl you better stop chasing her anymore. If you are still hell-bent, it is wastage of time and the time is money. Try your luck somewhere else instead of criticizing who are not ready to accept you. I’m sure you will find that someone very special sooner or later.
Some people have come up with the idea that marriage of Chitrali girls with outsiders is right. But I find it to be very illogical. It seems to me that it’s an argument that’s not really based on facts.
There are so many things that are new and different, interesting and challenging once a girl is married to boy from a different culture. These things can be a source of frustration and conflict, misunderstanding, hurting and in most of the cases lead to divorce of the girl.
Marrying a man from another culture can be exciting in the beginning but you cannot deny its repercussions in the long run particularly in the girls’ cases. One should be very careful especially the parents of girls while taking such decisions. However, we are not trying to convince you that marrying someone from another culture is right or wrong. That is something you will have to determine for yourself. But the word does say that a wise girl calculates the cost before beginning construction on a house. Hopefully, this will help you consider the cost of cross-cultural marriages. Marrying someone from another culture could means that the girl will be living outside of home nation permanently which means that you will not be able to see your family very often. That means your children will see very little of one set of parents (their grandparents).
Are you willing for your children to not really know your parents? Not only will your children not have the opportunity to know one set of grandparents very well, if there is a language barrier, one set of parents will not be able to really communicate well with your children.
Marrying someone from another culture means that you will have a hard time understanding each other. Things that are funny to you will not be funny to your husband. You will have to explain the humor to him and your in-laws. Are you willing to take the time to explain why something is funny to you? Marrying someone from another culture means that one of you will not be experiencing your cultural traditions. Marrying someone from another culture means that one of you must be willing not to give your children the cultural traditions and national heritage that you have. Are you willing for your children to grow up with a different set of family traditions than your own? Are you willing to lose your place in society?
I know all these things have no importance to anybody because only thing which matters is that the boy should be rich or settled in a foreign country like UK, Canada, Germany, Australia etc. These are the prerequisites if you want to marry a Chitrali girl, but unfortunately 99.9 percent Chitrali boys are not born with a silver spoon in their mouth.
The fortunate few Chitrali boys, who managed to go abroad, carried away the top Chitrali girls, whom they had not thought to marry even in their dreams. You have to be in a foreign country and it does not matter what you do there. A large number of girls especially from Lotkoh area are also married to Afghanis almost half of their age. The only reason for marrying off their daughters to these above 50 Afghanis is that they are settled in Canada.
This is one of our old habits to cry hoarse over major issues. Some time back, there were people who opposed the construction of Lowari tunnel on the excuse that after its opening up our culture will be at the risk of attack by outsiders. We should be dead sure that no strong culture can be destroyed merely by having exchanges with others. Secondly, in today’s world we cannot hide our heads in the sand to see an danger like an ostrich. If people are marrying off their daughters to outsiders and also bringing daughters-in-law from other cities, what is the problems with our culture. Please do not try to mix up the selling of innocent girls to outsiders, especially Punjabis, by ignorant people. That is something we have to stop by educating the parents. But when someone gets married to an outsider, whether male or female, there is no harm. It is my personal opinion and you may disagree with me.
This is not irrelevant at all because the issue we are discussing today should have been taken up by our political leaders long ago. But they have no time for such issues as their first priority is money making. The issue of marrying Chitrali girls to outsiders is a menace which must be stopped. A handful of so-called Chitrali elites, who have set bad examples by accepting outsiders as their sons-in-law, should not be allowed to create problems for the less-privileged class of Chitral. We cannot leave this to the parents of the girls who are desperate to marry off their daughters to outsiders despite the fact that there have already been cases of divorce among such women. This stubbornness to bring in people from Punjab, KP or Gilgit-Baltistan as sons-in-law should be resisted because it is a threat to our unique culture. Be practical, because wearing a Chitrali Pakhol and Shoqa to keep yourself warm in the winter is not enough to preserve your culture.
Lol. It’s a different Falak Naz, Bibi Jan is talking about! Talking about the marriage culture, let’s leave it to the parents to decide! You are all being very irrational by pinpointing individuals and their personal details!
The champions of Chitrali culture, who are often seen delivering long lectures to preserve the centuries’-old civilized traditions of the valley, completely forget the values when it hurts their own benefits. With pump and show, they celebrate the marriages of their daughters with outsiders.
It seems that the young educated Chitrali boys are not up to the mark and they welcome wealthy outsider sons-in-law, forgetting the cast, creed, sects and in most of the cases even the apparent look.
Majority of outsider Chitrali sons-in-law are often seen roaming in Chitral bazaar with inflated bellies. The scene gives the impression that a rogue elephant has entered a peaceful hamlet. But their Chitrali fathers-in-law have mastered the art of projecting them as Prince Charles.
By doing so, they still take pride in the superb culture of Chitral. This increasing trend and the inferiority complex has badly damaged our culture besides putting our existence as a nation at stake. These people could be seen sometimes talking about preservation of the Kalsh culture – just imagine! Oh man, first put your own house in order, then think about rest of the world.
The disadvantage, the real Chitralis are facing at the hands of these people, is that all their grandparents are either Pujabis, Pathans or a wealthy men from Mars can marry a beautiful Chitrali girl. The bond with these outsiders naturally becomes stronger bypassing their centuries-old traditions. Isn’t this a disservice to Chitral, but you are bent on harping the tune that you are madly in love with a Chitral, its culture and people.
History is witnessed that old civilizations of the world, far stronger than us, completely vanished when their genetic inheritance changed. Same is the case with some of the Chitrali elite, who declare themselves as the guardians of Chitrali culture but their actions speak otherwise.
Why Chitralis are so crazy in having Punjabi, Pathan, Giltik sons-in-law is a million dollar question to be answered. A large number of Pathans, who are running either small general stores or niswar shops in Chitral Bazar, have become the chosen sons-in-laws of Chitralis. What else I can say, may God help you and show you the right path.
The educated and culture-conscious people among us have all along been critical of those who marry off their daughters to outsiders like Pathans and Punjabis. Of late, there have been struggles to stem the tide, saying we should not ‘sell’ our daughters at the hands of unscrupulous people.
As awareness among the people is increasing about the troubles and hardships our daughter face after being blindly married to unknown people, our educated daughters and their parents should be mindful of the situation. If one of our highly educated daughters gets married to an outsider, it is her decision but what effect this would put on overall thinking of the people. On the one hand we are advocating to the lesser fortunate lots that we should not marry off our daughters to outsiders but on the other well-off educated people are preferring outsiders.
In my opinion, all the Chitrali women married to outsiders should not be called Chitralis. Besides, all women who luckily or unluckily have got married out of Chitral should not be allowed to take part in politics in Chitral.
If you are interested in politics, you must start struggle from where your husband comes from. You have got married with an outsider at your own free will. The parents of these girls intentionally marry off their daughters outside Chitral because they think Chitrali boys do not match their daughters at all.
To be more precise, these people think they have come from above and there is no match for their daughters in Chitral. This is an insult to the people of Chitral, especially the youth. How come you did not find even a single match for your daughter is the question which needs to be answered?
This is the mentality which has harmed the culture of Chitral and we must blame these people for tarnishing the image of Chitral.
The issue raised by Bibi Jan must be taken seriously as she has rightly pointed out that Falak Naz is no more a Chitrali as she has been engaged to a guy from Gilgit-Baltistan. We should not allow outsiders to haunt us in one way or the other. Only Chitralis have the right to represent and decide about the fate of Chitrali students. Sometimes, it is Musharraf and now some of these back benchers have come up to tell Chitralis what they should do. We will not allow these people. These outsiders must start politics from the platform of their respective areas. Well done Bibi Jan, we are with you and I would rather suggest you to take up the issue with people at the helms of affairs besides mobilizing the media against these opportunists. We are ready for a long march, as the decision taken by an outsider is not acceptable to us.